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The inner woman
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inner family (inner child, inner woman, inner man)
Spiritual Master Ayleen

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Hello, welcome to the inner woman

The inner woman is part of the inner family with inner child, inner woman and inner man. In my Christmas project 2015 about the inner family I talked about the inner child, the inner woman and the inner man in three German webinars. Here you´ll find the content of the webinar no.2 about the inner woman.

If you want to participate in another Christmas project about the inner family with inner child, inner woman and inner man in a slightly different form in 2016, you should follow me on Facebook and / or Google+.

All basic and background information you learn in my book Spiritual Psychotherapy: The inner family  (German edition, English translation is in progress), which has also a lot of information for interested layman.
inner woman, inner child, inner man (inner family)
Spiritual Master Ayleen


Webinar about the inner family - part 2: The inner woman

Welcome to my webinars about the inner family in everyday life. The inner family consists of an inner child, an inner woman and an inner man. These are not just any intrapsychic shares among other possibilities, but each individual human psyche is an internal family. From the condition and the composition of the inner family members derive every human personality structure.

That's why there are exactly three types of people, children, women and men in the outer as a mirror of the psyche. All human beings, so to speak, live in the middle of a model. You live in a concrete outer illustration of your inner family and therefore you can learn a lot.

Today I talk about the inner woman. The inner woman is the emotional base and the center of the inner family. She is responsible for feelings, contacts and relationships. She ensures the connection of the inner parts of the personality as well as the connection of external persons. For people with high inner woman share relationships are particular important.

The inner woman suffers much if relationships don´t work, but she is also the part of the personality, that makes relationships become happy. The inner woman can be very sad, disappointed and anxious, but only if her needs are not met by harmonious and loving relationships. Otherwise it is she, who feels emotional fulfillment.

The healthy inner woman has loving relationships inside with the inner child, the inner man and the transcendent. She ensures the integrity of the inner family and has a balancing effect. She is particularly sensitive and so much related to others, that she needs an internal or external man for orientation.

The inner woman is a very important intrapsychic personality share. If the inner woman is injured or underdeveloped, that leads to massive disruptions in all emotional and social areas. The inner woman is sentimental, open to others, compassionate, multitasking, linguistic, a team player and just in charge of relationships.

That is why I would like to specifically look at relationships, now. If you know the personality structure of people, all kinds of relationships can be designed much more constructive. In the following I mainly want to look at intimate relationships.

First, look at your own personality structure:
The state and the interaction of the inner family members result in the personality structure of a person. Therefore you should first find out, what kind of personality structure you have got yourself. If relationships are very important for you, you are an emotional person and you orientate yourself at your partner, you presumable have a high share of inner woman. If you are more interested in professional success than in relationships, prefer dealing with your hobbies rather than with other people, and are more individualistic, your inner man is standing in the foreground. There are also people with roughly the same strong inner man and inner woman personality shares.

Second, determine your own needs:
If you can judge your own personality, you should also be clear about your dream partner. Write down what features in a partner are important to you. Then sort them according to whether they belong to the inner woman or the inner man. With this you realize what kind of personality structure you are looking for in a partner.

Third, quality rating:
Now, it is time to judge, what wishes are realistic. An inner woman personality often feels attracted to an inner man person and vice versa, because they complement each other. Then, the inner woman personality can expect from the inner man partner stability, orientation, protection and demarcation and should in turn nourish the emotional range and invest into the relationship. But to seek in an inner man partner relationship skills, too, is unrealistic.

If one wishes for a dream partner with full, healthy and well-connected inner family members, you have to develop this inside of yourself first, because otherwise you cannot stand such a dream partner and would unconsciously boycott the relationship. There will always be a partner for you, who is equal to the current state of your consciousness. The other person is a learning task as a mirror for one's own unconscious. Accordingly, the right person will always be met at accurately the right time.

Fourth, more clarity on existing relationships:
It also makes sense to look at already existing relationships. What kind of personality structure do you have yourself and what is the personality structure of your partner? Do you appreciate the strengths of the other, which you yourself are missing? And do you expect things from the other, which are easy for you, but not for his or her personality structure?

Knowledge of the inner family may lead to completely new insights and more clarity.

Case 1) With my last boyfriend I was together for nine years. When we first met, I was early 20s, saleswoman and we both were still open to everything. But over the years we developed completely different. I flourished in my job, met with friends and loved to go out. He, however, remained at home and spoke early of an own family. Eventually, in the evenings we did not even know what we should talk about - and parted. It took me a long time to complete.

Their original base was inner woman harmony and emotionality. But then she developes her inner man (her job becomes important and she is active even if in relationship areas). Her inner woman development is saturated and she has grown out of it. On contrary he still wants to live his inner woman intensely (stay at home, own family). Their different development goals do not match. Therefore the separation is correct. But anyway, for inner women it is hard to separate.

Case 2) "I'm afraid of you," told me just a male colleague. "You seem so strong, that you could actually do all alone, and on top of this your income is high, too. There isn´t place for a man ".  My question: Can a man only be interested in a woman when he feels superior to her?

It depends on the personality structure of the man. If he has got a high inner woman share, he will feel attracted by a strong independent woman. The higher his inner man share is, the more he wants to feel superior. The questioner should seek a partner with low inner man share.

Case 3) Unfortunately I am late when it comes to men. With 33 years I had only one friend, while almost all of my friends are married for a long time by now or have a boyfriend. Often I'm the only single woman among many couples. Although I have many girlfriends it is maybe just because I'm boring and inexperienced, jammed? When I meet a nice guy, I'm too shy to go on, because I do not know how to do it. At the same time I would like nothing more than a dear friend or maybe a small family, who knows ...?

She has got an inner woman personality (missing energy, great longing for relationship) and feels inferior (boring). First of all, she should do something against her feelings of inferiority, best a therapy.

Then a delicate inner man partner, who is also shy, would suit her. If she learns to emit delicate signals, exactly the appropriate type of man will respond.

Conclusion:
The inner woman is an indispensable part of every personality to live happy relationships. She gives humans emotional depth and fulfillment. A healthy inner woman is very important for a high quality of life.